Namaste

My yoga studio is a super cute place where I often have revelations and interesting discussions with others. Recently a yoga inspired theme about money came up. My instructor said that in order to achieve balance we must consider the opposite of our actions. For example, our prosperity is directly related to our generosity. If you're not feeling particularly abundant, it has something to do with what you project outward to the world. I would have to agree with this and have seen it work. After I started volunteering with kids I got a job without trying, my financial aid came through with more than hoped for, and I was offered another option for health insurance. This all happened within a matter of days.

Other cute things come up that I chuckle at but they seem to have relevance too. The other day the owner mentioned that she had to tap into her ethereal wisdom when walking in to the studio every morning. Her intuition told her to light a particular candle in the bathroom, and then three of those same candles sold that day. None had sold for months until this move. It's a cute way of looking at the world. I like it.

Other times I can't relate. I like all the positivity stuff, but I think you should be able to say something sarcastic once in a while. I was talking to a woman that teaches yoga for weight loss and I wanted to know more about her classes. She went on and on about following this specific book and diet and meditation and cleansing and blah blah. I was not interested but wanted to be polite. I asked her what the goals of her class were, a specific size or just health or what? She said that it was mostly for the "lifestyle change," that everyone is always boasting having the answer to. I told her that I've been the same numeric weight for years give or take 5 pounds but I've gone up a pant size in the last year.

Do you think it's an emotional response?

No, I think I sit on my fat ass too much.

DON'T TALK ABOUT YOURSELF THAT WAY.

This woman was serious. She yelled at me. I whispered, "It was a joke. I, uh. Don't think I'm fat."

You can't be yourself around some of these yoga people because they live on another planet. Sometimes I wish I understood it and other times I wish that the girl doing her "cleanse" of vinegar and garlic smelling tea would just stay as far away from me as possible.

Today the studio had a psychic healer come in for a workshop. I was invited to go but respectfully declined. It was 3 hours!

I over-heard a conversation between the clairvoyant and the studio's owner. They were criticizing a man that considers himself an avatar and is able to heal people by becoming them and reading their DNA. Apparently he can even do this over the phone. He can heal whatever ails you and hurts by explaining what the pain represents and how your worries and thoughts fuel it.

In a hurried whisper I heard one tell the other about her experience with him and she said, "I don't think he's a real avatar."

I'm thinking this guy has a brilliant business plan.

A) come up with incredible bullshit based on self help books and wise religious sayings from various cultures

B) market yourself toward people that live on another planet but have money to spend on earth

C) cash in